Hi, and welcome to my website. My name is Pat DeYoung. My clients usually call me “Pat.” I have an MSW in social work, a PhD in philosophy of education, and I am a Registered Social Worker and a Registered Psychotherapist. For more than 30 years, I have practiced "relational psychotherapy" in Toronto.
If you want to know more about relational psychotherapy, click on www.tirp.ca, the website of the psychotherapy training program I helped develop. To know more about me, click on the About Me page. But probably you’re on this site because you’re wondering, first of all, whether I – or psychotherapy – can help you. So let me start there.
Here’s what I do to help. I invite you to sit down with me in a relaxed, informal way, and we talk. I help you tell me in detail what’s troubling you. I listen carefully, making no judgments, offering no easy answers. Instead, I help you make better sense of your experiences, thoughts, and feelings. I help you welcome emotions, discover meanings, recognize patterns, and explore options. I support you to think more clearly and kindly about yourself. I help you strengthen your sense of self and find more satisfaction in your connections with others.
If you've never been in psychotherapy, it can be hard to believe that "just talking" can be helpful.
But if you’re depressed and feeling bad about yourself, you can be profoundly helped by an in-depth conversation in which you come to understand and respect yourself -- yourself through the history of your lifetime, or yourself right now, or both. If your emotions are frightening, feeling them with someone who stays calm and connected with you can be a relief. If your emotions are confusing, talking about them can bring clarity. Talking about your stress is a first step toward making it manageable. If you have suffered a deep loss, you need someone to take time to talk with you and walk with you through your grief. Co-creating safe space where you can have the real conversations you need to have isn't "just talking."
When you give yourself time and space to be heard, and when someone truly listens, talking can help you feel coherent, whole, alive, valued, and connected. That, in a nutshell, is how relational psychotherapy works, and how I, as a relational psychotherapist, can help you.