Hi, and welcome to my website. My name is Pat DeYoung. My clients usually call me “Pat.” I’m a psychotherapist with an MSW in social work and a PhD in philosophy of education. I‘ve been working with individuals and couples in Toronto for 30 years, using what's known as "relational psychotherapy" to help them with their problems.
If you want to know more about me, you can click on the About Me page. To check out relational psychotherapy, you can click on www.tirp.ca. But probably you’re on this site because you’re wondering, first of all, whether I – or psychotherapy – can help you. So let me start right there.
Here’s what I do to help. I invite you to sit down with me in a relaxed, informal way, and we talk. I help you tell me in detail what’s troubling you. I listen carefully, making no judgments, offering no easy answers. Instead, I help you make better sense of your experiences, thoughts, and emotions. I help you discover meanings, recognize patterns, and explore options. I support you to think more clearly and kindly about yourself. I help you strengthen your sense of self and clarify your connections with others.
If you come for help as a couple, I listen to each of you in the ways I've mentioned. And I also help you work together to create safe conversational space where each of you can speak your truth and be heard with empathy by your partner.
If you've never been in psychotherapy, it can be hard to believe that "just talking" can be helpful.
But if you’re depressed and feeling bad about yourself, you can be profoundly helped by an in-depth conversation in which you come to understand and respect yourself. If your emotions are confusing, talking about them can bring clarity. Talking about your stress is a first step toward making it manageable. If you have suffered a deep loss, you need someone to take time to talk with you and walk with you through your grief. If you are part of a couple or family in conflict, you’ll find that tensions ease as you create safe space for real conversation.
In short, when you give yourself time and space to be heard, and when someone truly listens, talking can help you feel coherent, whole, alive, valued, and connected. And that, in a nutshell, is how relational psychotherapy works, and how I, as a relational psychotherapist, can help you.